The Boiling Cauldron

I liked Lesson 11 in BSF this week. I loved this from the lecture, somewhat paraphrased because it can be hard to write fast enough,

“You can’t drop your child off outside a school and expect them to learn because the school is nearby. They have to go in, get involved, do their homework and learn. It’s the same with God and Bible study”

Isn’t that the truth.

There were some questions about Jesus and his ability to withstand temptation to sin, addressed in Hebrews 4:14-16, that were particularly convicting. One question was “What is your biggest temptation?’ and then the next one was “How can verse 15 help you in this time of temptation?” The first is an easy one for me because it is something I struggle with all the time, sometimes daily. It concerns a wrong way fur rubber in my life, and NO this person does not live in my house.

I know this is my problem, I should not let the situation bother me like it does. I should be able to extend grace, forgiveness and mercy as Jesus has done for me, continually. I know this is sin, this ruminating, I know I need to release it to the Lord, turn my back to it, and walk away. But knowing and doing are two separate things. I want to do it, but it is complicated. It has many long tentacles, it affects other people, things keep coming up. I feel like I can succeed for a while but it is just putting a lid on the bubbling pot, waiting to boil over on another day.

BUT,  here is what I learned this week, which I have by the way heard before.

Hebrews 4:15-16

(NIV)

15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. 16 Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

Did you get that? He empathizes with me in my weakness! He doesn’t agree with me, but He understands. Sometimes all you need is to be heard. I can tell Him how I am feeling, the good, bad, the ugly and the uglier. And then the really good part, I can approach Him in confidence that He will help me in my time of need. Even if it is every day. He said so!

I don’t have the solution to my problem, if I did it would have been solved long ago. I want it to be removed like the cancer it is. I don’t want to just turn down the heat of the stove so the pot won’t overflow like a volcano. I want to remove the pot from the stove, better yet, let’s get rid of the pot. I don’t want a container to collect all of my anger, hurt, resentment, and irritation in. I don’t have the ability to get out from under this,  but God does. He knows how to do  it, and He said He will give me mercy and grace to help me in my time of need. He said it, and I believe it.  God’s word is true. Another part of our lesson, God cannot lie. So you see how this has all dovetailed nicely?

I’m not saying this will be easy, I have no illusions about that, it may never completely go away, but I am praying I remember this verse each and every time the problem rears its ugly head. They say it takes a month to create a habit. I am on day 2. Pray for me.

And special thanks to Jip the Farm Dog and Capri Deb for walking through the sewer of angst with me this week. And as always, to Honey, Mrs. Schmenkman (aka The Whine Recipient) Keelyody, Rae Babe, The Heifer, and my mentor Vickie, who I have dragged down there as well. I thank you all for your words of wisdom, comfort and advice. And mostly for still loving me in the midst of my un-loveliness. I am going to try and go it alone from now on. Well, not alone, Jesus is a really good walking partner.

Hopefully you will not read in my obituary that I was killed by a scalding, exploding pot.

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5 Comments

  1. caprilis said,

    December 2, 2011 at 9:27 AM

    You is funny Schmenky.
    I will pray for you and please continue praying for me as I deal with my very own bubbling cauldron of homones. Love you!

  2. December 2, 2011 at 9:41 AM

    I haven’t had a chance to tell you this but God has reminded me, on many occasions since the last time we saw each other, to pray for you about this situation. You are NOT alone! I always envy others (another of my sins) who seem to let hurts roll off their backs! Why, oh why, must I sit in the dust ruminating on thoughtless people?!? I’m so thankful that I’m slow on the uptake so that I don’t completely ream them out at the time — but I have spent a LOT of time, after the fact, coming up with the perfect come-back! Let me tell you that’s a productive use of my time — NOT!! Thanks for your vulnerability to write about this — I’m sure that God will use it to help many people! Love you and your heart! ❤

  3. Tammy said,

    December 2, 2011 at 11:57 AM

    Wow, I think you and Rachel have been living in my head and heart for awhile now. As always, this is perfect timing in my life right now. Thank you.

  4. Marlene said,

    December 2, 2011 at 4:50 PM

    Boy you speak like it IS girl. Praying for you about this. I feel a similar problem and I love your heart and recap of the message from BSF. We can never hear it enough. What a wonderful God that He knows what we are going through and He is there to take you out of that boiling pot.

  5. Deb said,

    December 2, 2011 at 8:21 PM

    Yes, CK you are able to cut to the quick in a humorous way. As you know, I have a similar problem too. And its great to have friends that will help turn down the heat a little. Praying for you.


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